Breaking

by Cold Wrecks

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1.
02:33
2.
01:31
3.
02:47
4.
02:38
5.
02:07
6.
02:28
7.
02:43
8.
01:53
9.
03:09
10.
03:19
11.
02:42
12.
04:35

credits

released July 11, 2016

CJ Dunaieff - Drums, Percussion
Craig Shay - Vocals, Bass
Matan Uchen - Guitar, Backing Vocals
Mike Vizzi - Vocals, Guitar

Featuring:
Freya Wilcox - Vocals (Track 9)

Recorded April 2016 at Cannon Found Soundation Studios in Union City, NJ.
Produced and Engineered by Jesse Cannon and Mike Oettinger.
Mixed and Mastered by Jesse Cannon.

Artwork by Ilana Hope

Music by Dunaieff, Shay, Uchen, and Vizzi
Lyrics by Shay and Vizzi

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Cold Wrecks Brooklyn, New York

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Track Name: Price
Eyes meet smiles and small talk and questions
And there’s no thought to the motivation you’ll need down the road
You start by gambling nights then weeks and months
And like a serious poker match it gets more serious
Like lifetimes and I don’t know shit I didn’t want this

But there was a wanting
When I hadn’t wanted for anything
And there are long hairs in my clothes
And pillows that smell like you for days
And there’s a dopamine release in my brain that I can’t stop chasing
And it’s crazy how long I can last off of that
I haven’t figured out lasting
Lasting and leaving
Neither appealing

I get back to the lasting
The last thing I keep are the mornings
I lose the nights and the days

It’s the price for love
It’s the price for being loved
Track Name: Kids
This is narcissistic hypocrisy
They’re screaming because they’ve got something worth screaming
So how can you justify hanging around with me?

October morning in the Eighties
Born clutching a silver spoon
And though I know I didn’t earn it I’m not letting go of it anytime soon

And the tears filled my eyes when he sang us that song
And I stepped in your way before moving along
Disgusting myself with my typical tendencies
I should know better by now

We’re selfish kids
We’re oblivious
Track Name: Suburbs
It’s funny you should ask me why I never visit home
It’s just awkward that your company makes me feel more alone
And I’m tired of pretending nothing’s wrong

We used to get our laughs in the cheapest fucking ways
It never seemed mean but I’ve been thinking back these days

And I’m the one that changed
Sometimes I wish you could do the same

I’ve been trying to wash these words off of my lips
Find something honest to replace them with
And I don’t hate you, I just know you’ll never get it
And you don’t have to get it

And I wish you wouldn’t ask about my best laid plans
You wouldn’t like the answer if I had one
And your disappointed looks always keep me on the hook
But I refuse to die for that

This isn’t what you want
But this isn’t about you
This isn’t what you want

I’m just trying to flush the suburbs from my blood
And I’m scared that you’re the person I’ll become
And I don’t hate you, I just know you’ll never get it
And you don’t have to get it, you just have to respect it

I’m just trying to clean the garbage from my floor
Or maybe just hide behind my door
And I don’t hate you, I just know you’ll never get it
We’ll probably just forget it
Track Name: Letters
You tore off my skin with your teeth and you shaved my face
Didn’t leave any cuts with your dull pink razor blade
But did you think this was serious?
No, that’s not something that we get
From these late night phone calls and I always let

Myself get carried away
With all the things you say
And I drink them in
Like I drink everything
Careful at first but I get lost sometimes

You wrote me a letter
The stamp said forever
But the mailman doesn’t do his job
I found it buried in a newspaper with Hebrew letters
It had the wrong address
But I still found it buried
Yeah I still read it by myself

I took a kitchen knife to the envelope
Slim fingers never do this right
And I shut the door lay on my bed
Reminds me that I always let
Myself get carried away
Track Name: Drawbridge
When I said I loved you
You said you hoped so

But I still take you phone calls
And once a week
I am shot dead
From a stolen rifle
That was well kept

It’s small and it’s slow
And it stings and I know
That I’ve worked towards this death my whole life

Breathe out
Collect last thoughts
Bleed out
Lay down

Have another conversation
Say sorry
Feel like Tennessee Williams
When I try to explain

And you all give me that look

One day
I won’t wait
For the drawbridge
I’ll gun for it anyway
Track Name: Friends
I heard you lying to each other in the hallway
And I hope you didn’t know it, but haven’t we been through it
In high school or summer camp, college dorms or offices
You won’t be upset for very long

Because absence makes the heart forget
The things we shared and what they meant
The truth is we’re selfish, we live in the moment
It hurts to admit that we couldn’t care less

I wanna miss my old friends

My shoulder was a swamp by the time that we were done
You moved out to Washington, predictably I moved to Brooklyn
And I’m not the type to keep in touch because the pressure is a little much
So I’ll leave you a voicemail on your birthday
Or I’ll forget to call you on your birthday

Absence makes the heart forget
The things we shared and what they meant

I wanna miss my old friends
But I don’t miss my old friends anymore

So I’ll forget to call you on your birthday
No, you don’t need to call me on my birthday
Track Name: Heaves
I had to look around but I figured it out
Am I feeling regret or am I lying again?
I don’t need explanations and you didn’t need to call me
I appreciate the gesture

I wish I could have told you how it felt but I don’t feel much these days
And when I do it’s all confused and you don’t need that shit

So I’ll medicate as the noise escalates
And as my house collapses to the ground, the earth starts to shake
And then my mind becomes a canvas as the ink spills on the ground
‘Cause it’s the worst thing that could happen and it’s happening right now
Between the cops and the creeps and the party and the heaves
And the anxious piercing echo in our heads that says we’re fucked

And now I know
More about myself than I ever wanted to know

So I’ll medicate as the noise escalates
And as my house collapses to the ground
The earth rocks my fevered brain

I’ll make sure you never find me
Track Name: Sad
She said you’re sad
I said you’re said
And you’re spilling everything I don’t have to
She said to be alone for a year
She said that everyone will leave
If I don’t get it together

Like nothing
Like every fight I’ve ever heard
Like love
Like the lie that’s told and told again
Like last weeks of lives
The regrets that already bore me
Every door that leads to better or for worse
Like walls, the structural façade
Like the waiting, always waiting for the next big thing to come
Like the risk I always take
And I am told to take no risks
And if that’s the way I live my life I’ll just end up like this
Making midnight calls and offerings and breathless arguments
The venom that I can produce
The holes I wear in all my shoes

And I know we does this to ourselves
And I know how we all wind up
I know that we’re all worse for wondering
The work our own hands can produce
The better side of all bad news
Track Name: Down
Staring down an empty tunnel
Staring down my empty eyes
Searching for something you swear you’ve seen before
But just can’t seem to find anymore

And when I let you down
You’ll see it coming from a mile away
A mile away
And when I let you down
You’ll see it coming from a mile away
And I’ll bet that you can see it now

And I’m chasing the serotonin
I haven’t felt since – oh god, how long has it been?
And then we started to walk, but then it started to rain
And then we started to talk, but then you started to cry
And now I’m starting to get comfortable again

And you hope
And you pray
And you swear I’ll come around one day
Track Name: Fistfight
Biting my tongue is not what it’s like
Bury my body and write what’s unresolved on a chalkboard
And have the kids try to work out my problems

You can see enough to know
What’s hardly there
But sometimes you crash
You crash anyway

If I don’t tell you how I feel
I already have a foot out the door

If I’m going down it’s for real
It’s not with a smile, no
It’s a fist fight in a park
I stop short of telling you to leave

Are you on someone else’s hook?
Pierced through your soft cheek
When you have the reel
The handle has a different feel
Track Name: Montreal
Kate said she didn’t have tattoos
But when she was young she drew
All over her arms and legs
She knew what to do
But Canada’s far and I’ve done this thing enough
A nice night is so much

Our maps were our lead ups
The lines across lands
The touch of hands on hands
And not much else

Montreal
I remember it all
And let’s keep it between you and me

No bitter New York
No prospect park
I miss the accents
And I know it wouldn’t last
If I stayed But I liked

The first time
And old friends
Again and again
I watched you tattoo
Watched you bruise
Keep you covered
Keep you new

With last moments and hobbled plans
The longest nights when I couldn’t stand
And a cab that I did not hail
Stopped to take me home
How I did not know
I emptied my pockets and I walked slow

When I did leave
I always leave
And you’re better off without me
Track Name: Broken
It’s a tragedy, they say
That memories decay
But I remember remembering pain
And disappearing seems okay

November’s passing by
And for once I haven’t cried
But I can never shake the images
That reside on the backs of my eyelids

And I, I was weightless
And the saddest thing I’ve ever seen
Was you crying alone on the doorstep
And begging me to say

That this was just a bad, bad dream
This was just a sick, sick joke
But it was just a cold, cold night
And you were broken

It was five years to the day
And I remember that look in your eyes
And we didn’t feel okay
We watched balloons rising up to the sky

And I never keep in touch
I just get bummed out in my room
This silence is a crutch
And I won’t be seeing you soon

And they, they were weightless
And I wished they could carry us with them
And I wonder if you were waiting
For anyone to say

That this was just a bad, bad dream
This was just a sick, sick joke
But it was just a cold, cold night
And you were broken

And this disease is the only thing that’s keeping me alive
But I’ve been living here alone with it for too much time
So please, please, please distract me